Movie night at the Ruiters...

Art...has a fundamental role to play in the evolution of community since artistic form is not simply the ornament of society but is an important measurement of the progress made in reaching the ideal. The creation of models of profound beauty have, by their very order, educative effect; art becomes in time a common experience of unity in the culture of a whole population. Otto Donald Rogers

Fifth Element
Life of Brian
Malcolm X
Good Night Good Luck
Matrix
Gattaca
Julie & Julia

Introducing our kids to films that we love, been impacted by and helped shape our understanding our the community at large is SO FUN. To watch their reactions, their laughter, their understanding of the jokes, and to come away with a new view of the world is such an experience. As my kids get older (now 10 and 13) I am struck by their view of the world. And even though they see much of it based on our world view, they are more buoyant- energetic and full of MORE potential that we ever had.

For example, my daughter sees the world through LeLu's eyes (reference to 5th element) and wants to make a change so her world can be safe than it is now, and more environmentally sound. She is dedicating her life to planet earth and aims to be a scientist/engineer to do something about it. Likewise, understanding the civil rights movement from the past shows her the origins of the breakdown of the issues facing the 21st century. It is a history that repeats itself but for hearts that want to change the world for the better.

My son notices the music behind the stories, and wants to tell his own. He is moved by the energy of the films, the impact of laughter, the development of the arc and how music in particular plays a significant part of the plot building and emotion that cannot be replicated without it. He also is convinced that the red pill is the only way to go... (reference to Matrix for those of you who haven't seen it, and fyi see it!!) He finally also realized that cooking art is a joy that can be built upon even the most mundane of meals into something beautiful, creative and fun.

We all laughed out loud with Life of Brian - which was a film I never saw. How can I refuse after my kids had the patience to see a film from 1979 without any complaints and with rapt attention. Despite not having CGI, effects, or sci fi story lines, the movie makes a great statement of group behavior rendering the lessons learned about individual critical thinking lasting and effective.

The family's impact is price less. I look forward to more.

10 years is a long time....

10 years ago I needed a change. I was in between jobs temporarily providing legal services at Bear Sterns as legal counsel in the IP department while seeking a new place of employment. During my quest, I was diligent, finding jobs on the Internet, posting a letter plus resume and sending them regularly at least once a week for a few months. I was trying to 'find' that right opportunity but often waited for a reply to see which one would seem to 'pick' me.

One day as I was reflecting on my process, I decided to give meditation a try and came to a very interesting conclusion. During my quiet moments, I came to a lake side neighborhood that I used to live in where my father and I would often walk around the lakes after dinner and talk while he would smoke his cigar. He died during my 1st year of law school and I miss him all the time. But at this moment, I could feel his presence and kind eyes asking him a question and really just clarifying the dilemma I was facing.

"What do you want? Name 5 things that are important to YOU in a job. Don't let one pick you, let the right one come to you"

I'm not sure what happens during meditation except time and logic seem to fall away. At that moment I thought really hard to find out what were the essential keys that I was looking for? The next few ideas that landed shaped my requirements for the job that I was looking for.

Culture - because working in a place that was 'un' progressive, stagnant and too slow was not aligned to my type of energy and I realized I needed something that made sense on an everyday level.

Flexibility - I had two young children, a baby and a 4 year old I was not going to leave them and be away 15 hours a day. At the time Bear Sterns was requiring me to do this and it was really untenable. I felt like I was in Boot camp in NY living with crazy early hours and not getting home until late. I was NOT interested in this type of work cycle.

Well Paid - this was important because for a few years I took a big pay cut to justify a calmer work life balance and realized that the ultimate job that I knew I could do would be more high paced, exciting and passionate in every way, so I set my sights on something better.

Challenging Work- legal is my passion, it is not a job. I cannot be in a work environment where my 9-5 is clocking in and out working through the legal side of things and going home. I crave excitement, newness and love to exercise my creativity in my work. I know that not being challenging would dry my energy right up.

Objectivity- forming legal judgment requires honesty, accuracy and well analyzed though process that cleanly identifies the issues. Once you form a view point, there should be no 'pulling back' or 'changing up' the view simply because "they" are in the room. I experienced a job where I had to be very careful who I said what to, and without reason or justification my approach would need to change because of a political gain. I cannot be a face for hire that changes on whims of political or personal gain. I promise my best work in a well reasoned way and through time one learns how to use wisdom and tact to carry the information forward to the audience but it should not be pushed nor reshaped for personal gain.


These were the 5 for me...and they still hold true 10 years later. As I reflect on these ares, I find maybe one or two of them could be at risk and it makes me realize that being true to myself is as important now as it was then. No matter how far I have come in last 10 years in my current role and company, it is still essential to reflect again see what happens...next.

Another year

Happy 2012! As my daughter Isabella described it, the planet went around the sun for the 2012 year...that made me smile somehow. I am ready- refreshed and excited to welcome this year's adventures, challenges and path. I find it very calming that this year - as the eve passed, and Pieter and I spent a great dinner with friends talking and catching up- we took some time late from 1AM till about 3AM talking and catching up on where we are on our path, and it was pretty cool.

You see, back in 1994 when I first met Pieter, it was the beginning of an honest, open all-in friendship which began by the questions of 'why are we here' and more importantly, 'why do we do what we do' - though this is a very short version of the discussions we had when we first met, it basically captures the gist. That is to say, we both separately before we met went through some experiences in life that made us think hard about what we should do with our lives. This was interesting to find out- separately since we didn't know each other and found later when we did meet, that these thoughts of conceptual 'why' questions were hard to discuss with our peers at the time. Not very many law students were really interested in those questions; nor was I able to connect with people who understood that asking questions was in fact relevant.

In retrospect, I believe that both of us were faced with tough circumstances at a young age, and that perhaps our notion of 'truth' and understanding 'reality' was really important. Otherwise, why continue in the face of great difficulty? Perhaps it is easy to ignore big questions, or to avoid them, because of what we are afraid will result. But at the time, at least for myself, the fear was in not knowing.

As it happened, both of us- independently but in parallel found that the Baha'i Faith presented answers to many of our questions- and after research (2 years by me, and intensely for 6 months for Pieter) we realized that the path best suited for our lives was a journey of learning and of service- no matter the challenge or the difficulties that beset us. Moreover, on that path, laden within the Writings and guidelines and explanations, lies the core underlying structure of how to be. The Baha'i Faith presented a new paradigm of understanding humanity- For the first time, the unfolding of a greater story became relevant, one that required a new understanding of people, the purpose of religion and the steps to get us towards our best selves.

I met Pieter and there I found most unexpectedly- a person who could not only understand me, but someone who knew why I was inspired to do what I could do, and someone who respected that path for himself as much as I had for myself- if not more. At the same time, I found a companion who enjoyed 80's music, gourmet food, and exploring cities endlessly through the wee hours...what an unlikely but delightful discovery!

We were married 9 months later, and have been for the past 17 years and in the middle of it all, we have had a wonderful experience on our journey, were blessed with 2 kids, learned a great deal about service, friendships, challenges in legal/corporate worlds, the endless learnings of parenthood, love, and companionship. Its been a journey though not easy, that I constantly feel thankful for...

So this past new year's eve, after our friends departed, we had another great talk about where we were, how it all fits and where we plan on going. It was a re calibration and steady balance that we know where we need to be and will take the journey together- but also independently side by side.

To another year- an adventure, and to life ; )

The greatest moments of the week

Its been a very crazy couple of weeks- traveling to Long Island, Manhattan, Boston and TX over the last month plus long working hours can keep my schedule running beyond my control. However, its really good to keep in mind a few special moments that make 30 minutes the best moment of my day. Today for example was a delightful morning where i assisted Alec in the construction of his Gingerbread (okay, graham cracker) house with the rest of the 1st graders at his school this morning.

I was ready to be 'hands off" and only helped where he needed me to, i.e. cutting up the crackers, the candy canes and sticking frosting on the marshmallows. It was fun- a collaboration made in Candy Land and it was cool to be there. (Not sure how good it will taste, but the eating is not in this case the objective I think)

This leads me to reflect on what makes us really happy inside, I've had amazing experiences at work over the past several months while our company is in the process of a culture change and has stimulated everyone to try to think outside the box. I am inspired by these changes and believe there are some very good outcomes that can and will come from it, but only if we stay focused and keep our visions in tact. So- overall when i think of work, I am on a positive and learning journey.

What makes me happiest however are moments with the family and where I personally can just be Mom and hang out with my kids. I may have a crazy schedule at work that makes me think across solutions and complex issues, but standing by the bus and waiting with my son before he goes to school, or reading to my daughter a novel at night that is more compelling than a John Grisham read are clearly the best moments that feed my heart & soul ; ) Looking forward to more...

Getting ready for ski time this winter

Skiing- the ultimate active family, expensive prep, but incredibly satisfying sport...

After going on our 1st true ski vacation this January in Stowe, Vermont our family was hooked to make this a normal part of our winter routine going forward. Though I remain the most timid- I am learning to love a sport that requires you to truly let go in the moment and just enjoy. This remains a sport that is still a little scary for me personally, but when I can let go and feel the snow pass under me, and speed down the mountain, its exhilarating. ; )

So in order to prepare for this coming winter, we have checked out various options to ski 'locally' i.e. 90 minutes or less away from our house to ski during the weekends this winter.

We traveled to Camelback area yesterday to check out the base camp and took about 60 minutes to discuss various coupon options with the kind helper behind the desk. We also booked a locker...which is a long story but suffice it to say, having a private locker where you can sit and properly change into your ski boots without being pushed aside or squeezed into a tiny bench while your kids take turns sitting is essential for a comfortable ski experience. Other issues or topics? Making sure we have as many decent beginner and intermediate trails as possible; AND verifying that ski lessons are well instructed, organized and flexible. Each of these thus far were confirmed so we expect at least 5-6 trips to Camelback (or more) this winter.

My only wish that seems to be hard to satisfy- is having a ski on ski off lodge area near by that is very comfortable, and a place where snow boarders are few and far between. My only concern on this issue is that they can go very fast and while enjoying the skiing down hill, it can be quite disconcerting to have a snow boarder run right past you at high speeds. I am hoping this season has more nice snow and less of the boards!

Back in 2011

Hi there bloggers- its been a while, but I have again thought and believe that I should write once more. It is a Saturday afternoon and I am about to cook some spaghetti sauce for the family- we are waiting for a potential car buyer and our pool has been recently installed in our backyard (20x40)...

Through all this, and while working a job that takes me way more hours than I'd like to admit, I find less & less time to write more than my typical Facebook entry.

But now I am making a goal to write once a week on life's path- so I can track the days as time goes so fast on love-kids-family-work and the things we learn along the way.

Looking forward to it!

its been a long time

Hi blogger world- its been a long time since I have written on this Mystic Logic. I find that life has swept me up in experiences that are hard to describe especially in the Facebook world we live in. It all comes down to 3-4 sentences. Thats it. Random quotes, suggested poems, ideas and wishes are what I write now-

I wonder.

Maybe its time to write again. My life has changed a bit since last year. We came back from France and my job changed twice- in the same company but different responsibilities. I have learned so much about challenges at work- but the best thing that happened this year only happened a few months ago.

Music-

Thanks to my insightful husband, who has tried to urge me to get back into singing over the past 2 years, it finally worked. I never knew that music and singing meant so much to me- but now I do. It hard to describe how the creative side can overwhelm every other side of our mind, physicality and intellect. My spirit becomes alive- and music just happens. I sing now at least 2-3 times a week in our new 'music studio' which Pieter and I created and retrofitted our guest room (though we made a new guest room upstairs)

So whether its Dee Lite, Sarah, Alphawezen, Sade or Norah Jones- I sing and my voice and everything else gets real happy. Who knew? Oh yeah, Pieter did. : )

There is in souls a sympathy with sounds:
And as the mind is pitch'd the ear is pleased
With melting airs, or martial, brisk or grave;
Some chord in unison with what we hear
Is touch'd within us, and the heart replies.
~William Cowper

Transported to Once.

I am sitting here on a Friday night, working on legal analysis for work, and have finished with a feeling that I need to hear music. Typically when I am home, i will work out (which I have done straight for the last 8 days and really needed a break); or catch some TV to chill and wind down my hectic thoughts. Tonight, I was inspired to watch the movie Once (again) and just listen to the music and to sing, in a mesmerized way connecting with the notes, the feelings and the sound. Somehow this inspires me to a place where dancing or singing out loud is expected; -where the spirit soars and music helps me get there. It is in these times where I feel I was made to sing and should do so.
I will just stay in this moment for a while, just this Once.

Remembering how to say I love you in Montmartre

On Saturday, we headed to Montmartre, with Mary-Ellen the same nice woman who had taken us on the Chocolate tour on Wednesday. She was very kind to actually plan a little respite in a playground especially for the kids in the middle of our tour as well as bringing some biscuits with chocolate as a treat for them. Very thoughtful--
As soon as I walked along the stony paths-through cafes, art galleries and lovely patisseries, I felt at home. This was a place where part of the Bohemian Paris was born- a place where Toulouse Lautrec immortalized the ladies of the cabarets and where writers, singers and artists alike spent their time creating future historical spots all through the neighborhood (Van Gogh and his brother Theo, Salvatore Dali, the Egyptian Italian singer Dalida who led a famous life but ended tragically etc.) This was also the place of the lovely film Amelie--could I say more?

Of course, to top it off, our 1st site was the wall of love, a wall that had I love you written in hundreds of languages-- a welcome sign that I think is perfect! (thats the picture above!)

Upon walking through these corridors, both Pieter and I knew that of the places in Paris, this had a sense of home-calm-and spirit that we hadn’t felt as much of in any other part. Much of Paris is so stunning-light everywhere, pretty homes, gorgeous views from almost every angle, and yet the sense of home and warmth is not always present. This was a place that we could come again to- and maybe next time spend some more nights just being in the lovely part of Paris…

Following Montmartre and a salad for lunch (I tried and savor many goat cheese salads while here), we headed over to Bon Marche, the oldest department store in Paris while Carla headed on out on her own for the day back to the Salvatore Dali museum and Notre Dame.

By this time the kids were really tired and truly needed a break. So upon arriving at Bon Marche, we searched for a respite. Under a beautiful Moroccan style tent, we sipped tea and chilled for an hour, while the kids sat across from us watching Mulan on Pieter’s iPHONE (the best creation yet). That was relaxing, and probably one of the other nicest moments in Paris.

We didn’t have time to browse or shop- but for this trip, that’s okay. This was discovery for the kids’ time…and the discovery of this town was almost to an end. All that was left was 1 more day ahead, and this time, we would finally get to the Eiffel Tower.

D’Orsay and Pompidou

Rather than heading to VERSAILLES due to impending rain (only a few drops came actually), we changed our tour to Musee D'orsay. Luckily, our special "context travel" tour guide Robyn knew tons of information about this place. She had studied art history, Dutch and was from the US. She was perfect, friendly, warm and really knowledgeable about the sculptures-paintings and even the building itself. It was really a joy...we had some fun notes to compare while she had mentioned she had a Dutch boyfriend once--

The highlights of the visit of the museum had to be seeing the Degas Ballet Dancer sculpture, which Bella had read about for the past 2 years in a lovely book about Degas and a story how he sculpted the ballerina-and as a special gift, she gave him the ribbon she wore. Well, the ribbon was on site, as well as many other paintings from Van Gogh, Monet, and more. I know that art can be simplistic as viewing pretty pictures but when you hear about the "why" a painting was painted, or how someone broke the 'mold' of the academics and pushed the artistic envelope- that's what is inspiring.

Alec was mostly bored during this museum visit, but Pieter and I decided that it was just fine for Alec and Bella to get bored too. Part of this trip was learning how much of Paris that we loved, could be loved by a 5 and 8 year old. The other part was learning how to deal with the comments like "I'm tired" "I'm bored" "When will we be home?" or "Can I have ice cream again?" as well as the great ones like "this is the best day of my life" or "WOWWWWWW, look at that!" and "This is the best crepe!" or "I can't wait to see our tour guide again!"

Anyway, in order to switch it up a bit, we did try to mix the cultural visits with a playground, running around activity to get them into their active happy mode too. But this day, we figured we could try to skip it and head maybe to a 2nd museum that night. We kind of learned our lesson. After crepes and a little rest, we headed towards George Pompidou, the cool museum with the escalators that go really high. At least to our kids, that was the highlight. We were hoping that since there was a Calder exhibit who specialized in performance art and creating circus animals, that the viewing would be fun for all of us.

Well, the circus was kind of cool- when you enter his exhibit, there was a 60 minute film on the artist which was a kind of documentary of Calder performing his ART. He created circus acts made of wire, cloth, springs and leather each of them performing tricks. We saw Calder himself display a wire lion jump through a hoop-a trapeze wire act—a dog riding a bike and so on. It was clear that his art combined science, math, engineering, physics and pure ingenuity. The kids were riveted, at least I thought. How did I know that at the end of the viewing of the actual wire circus acts shown in the film- they would ask for the “Real Circus” and then comment on how boring it was??

It was maybe boring to them at the time- but when you glanced at their faces when they spotted the exact wire circus pieces that they had just seen in the documentary on display--they were wowed. They are learning hundreds of things and watching new images through out every day- tasting the Paris they never knew existed. I never realized they would endure walking everyday for 5 hours without complaining- how to eat and drink not upon convenience but whenever we can- and that different art, parks and places exists and can be appreciated.

It just has not all sink in just yet...

Investigating art and a way to see the Tour Eiffel

We started today with a tour of the Louvre- called Muse Clues, a tour specifically geared for Alec and Bella (okay kids in general) Anyway, our tour guide Inga, a former New Yorker who has found her more French side guided Alec and bella through their 1st Art Detective investigation.

It was a nice tour where Bella and Alec were tasked to solve 11 clues through answering questions in and around the museum. Each clue was set among different periods of history including French Medieval period, Italian Renaissance, and Mesopatamia. And, along the way they learned nuggets of art history that they will likely always remember...how and why Venus di Melo is so popular (her movement is captured in marble like no one else could do)- why De Vinci's Mona Lisa was so special (a shift in portraits from only profiles to front view--and that she follows you wherever she is and finally-that she is smiling, apparently a rare change in portraits until De vinci dared to be different) and viewing the stones of the initial foundation of the Louvre when it was a fortress in a moat built 800 years ago (that was cool for such obvious reasons). At the end, because they both were full "art detectives" that broke the code, they happily received their treasure- but only after having to request it in Francais.

After a quick recuperation at the apartment, we headed to the Eiffel Tower to view the Parisian skyline in all its beauty-- Alec screamed at delight at the possibility and Bella hopped skipped and jumped over to the Bateau-Bus boat which would be the beginning of our journey there.

Upon arriving at the Tour Eiffel, we found lines around and around and around and around and around and around loops which seemed to never end. Watching this long snake of a cue was an obvious issue for all of us, how long can we wait on this thing? Well- can you guess what we did?

We walked around it, viewed some expert soccer kids twist and move the soccer ball in ways I never knew possible-- like the parisian soccertrotters or something, anyway, that was cool. Then, we bought some souveniers at the trinket shop and then bought an ice cream.

By this time, we realized the reality of the "what do we do now" question was fully understood. We would NO WAY wait and was now looking for a way out. But Alec, poor Alec had his heart of hearts set on this journey, and asked about every possible way, every doorway (exit doors looked empty to him) and wondered whether Mommy could make a phone call and we could get in... What a resourceful and smart but not very correct son I have. Anyway, just as he began to cry, and cry and get quite upset, my daughter Isabella spotted a dual horse carriage about to depart from the Park. She told me and actually reminded me that 2 years ago (she keeps count) I promised her in Princeton NJ that we would take a carraige ride next time... but the next time never came around as it was a Winter buggy and a short season. Anyway, we all looked at each other and decided a horse buggy ride would do nicely, and Alec actually stopped tearing and got excited.

We took the ride through the 7th Arrodisement, waving at the onlookers and trying to figure a new way to see the Eiffel Tower without the long lines. Well, we enjoyed the ride, and Alec asked at least 7 different times, in 3 different ways, whether and when we could go--I had to be honest, I said I don't really know...

Speed ahead to dinner at the apartment (Pieter and I got Indonesian take out-- it was very good) and we are browsing away on the Internet seeing if there are other ways to get into this steel wire tourist trap without having the trappings of hell long waiting lines.

Found something!!! It just so happens that on Pieter's upcoming birthday, on Sunday July 19th, the restaurant on the 1st level (58 Tour Eiffel) 58 meters above ground, had an open dinner reservation at 6:30 PM for 5. It actually allows us to have a decent dinner (not too expensive, and there is a kid's menu) with ADMISSION to the 1st level of the Eiffel tower included....

So, plans have been made, we will be there, and finally our kids will view the view!!!!

Chocolate and more chocolate

Day 2: A chocolate tour
This morning we took a tour through 5 decadent chocolate patisseries in Paris--some of the most amazing tastes i have ever savored. Who ever knew that single origin chocolate from Indonesia is velvety smooth, rich and melts like nothing before. What about lychee chocolate--or 3 honey chocolate--and of course praline (roasted almonds-hazelnuts and chocolate...)MMMMMMMMM. The kids enjoyed the scenery, watching a chocolate fountain, viewing shiny chocolates that have gold sprinkling- and the prettiest designs and shapes (hearts, a high heeled shoe, tour eiffel etc.)

All the places were presented to us from a lovely tour guide that is from Minnesota who has lived in France for 17 years; her insight and history of the chocolate itself was kind of riveting for me (never knew real chocolate was made by hand...machines can only dilute the stuff but not really remove it from the cacao beans) Anyway, the kids kind of lost interest at this point, but it was great to hear about how much work goes into the chocolate itself (What a God given treat...) However, at the same time, it is ironic how far away the typical market brands are from the original. I do somewhat see a movement towards a more sophisticated palate in the direction of the pure chocolate I tasted (a la Whole Foods, organic, etc), but i am not sure Halloween candy will ever match the good stuff.

Dinner notes
So tonight we were able to have our Mom in law babysit the kids while Pieter and I stepped out into Quartier Latin for some dinner. I tried to research a restaurant that had some international flavor but was not crazy in price. Mind you, this was difficult since many of the top reviewed places have a sort of gastronomy type menus...(how does 400 Euros sound per person????) So instead, we went to Ze Kitchen Galerie..an art gallery/southeast Asian inspired french cuisine close by to where we are staying. Let me 1st say, next time I think I should take the hint, that when you enter a crowded restaurant with lovely people--receive menus that do not have any familiar dishes, and get unlimited olives which Pieter and I do NOT enjoy--we should leave. I tasted a few good things at the restaurant, but honestly? It was not really southeast Asian influenced, except for a piece of coriander and lemon grass on the plate I was eating from. Not really cool, and frankly we would have rather gone to the near by creperie or bistro for a burger. But have you ever sat in a crowded place and been served immediately and then just walked out?? Well, next time we find that situation, we just might.

Anyway, after our -not outstanding but oh well-dinner, we walked around and talked about all the places that we have been (St Petersburg, Finland, UK, Holland, Colorado, NY etc) and realized that the entire world is filled with so many views, pleasures and beauty- but the most important thing is your sense of how much you (in the sense of the spirit) feels at home.

Until the next adventure!

Journal of Paris vacation: 1

I am finally on holiday!! Two weeks of Europe with the family; with the 1st week in Paris. The next couple of posts will be a journal of our trip...vive la France!

Day 1: Walking through the scenes of Paris

La Duree Breakfast on Quartorze Juillet...
Who knew that on the morning we had breakfast reservations at the famous La Duree on the Champs Elysee--we would be unable to savor the lovely desserts since the entire Champs Elysee was crowded and full of parade watchers for the Quartorze Juillet Parade... So we bought some crosissants, yogurt and pain chocolat at a nearby bakery and ate on the street while watching the military planes ahead fly by...what an experience. I heard later that there were about 1 Million people watching with us.

Tour Eiffel
Following our breakfast, we decided to check out the Tour Eiffel at the Trocadero. Although a great view, the vendors are everywhere selling tour eiffel trinkets by the dozen (1 euro for 3 towers etc.) I didnt mind this until someone placed 3 mini eiffel towers in Alec's little hand. Bad sales behavior in my book. No sale. Anyway, we moved on to get some drinks and rest our tired feet (we already walked at least 2 hours already the 1st morning.) We then took a Bateau Bus which is a tour bus on the water where you can hop on and hop off at various attractions along the Seine. It was nice, but kids can only take about the 1st 10 minutes, at the 40th it was more like (are we there yet????) We hopped off and walked the rest of the way to our hotel.

Dinner was at the Creperie and was very nice (tasted not as good as Pieter's pancakes but very tasty and nice atmosphere, and the best part it is 90 seconds away from our hotel) We savored the crepes avec sucre, et framboise... yum.

Jardin du Luxembourg
After dinner, we went through the Metro to a well reviewed park in one of the many 'kid-guide' books I bought on Paris. So this garden supposedly has a great playground and perfect spot for kids. Upon getting to the garden, after trekking through the ponds, forest and paths, we found an enclosed playground hideaway.

It was lovely, full of slides, rides, rope climbing and cool stuff, but but NOOOO!!! It was closed! It was only 8:45 PM so it was not dark, but apparently at 7 PM, this little play haven is locked up. (there is also a 3Euro charge to get in for adults and kids so they officially lock it up with gates.

Ah, tant pis. But heaven awaits, since on the way out of the park, we bumped into Amore one of the best gelato places in Paris, where their scoops are designed in a shape of a flower, so yummy and so pretty at the same time (a metaphor for the city i think). Anyway, we were happily digesting our cornets (cone in francais) when we stopped for tea before the big firework display.

Tea at Cafe Dauphine.
To prep for our firework viewing (at 11 PM at night) we decided to pass some time drinking tea and juices at Cafe Dauphine (never mind the 6.50 a cup for tea) This was a better place than we thought since we were able to wind down, drink tea, and prep the kids for a little wait before we actually see the big splash in the sky. (Mommy note: I bumped into a nice American in the bathroom who was also breast-pumping at the same time. I had to empathize with her, since that was me only 5 years ago. and how I can recall the days of inconvenient but worthwhile sacrifices we continue to go through for our kids.)

Fireworks!!!
Wow, we got a seat on the bridge next to the Place de la Concorde and sat among Japoneese, German, Dutch, French and more, all waiting for the celebration to begin. It took about 35 minutes before we saw the lights in the sky... The Tour Eiffel was basking in the light and we enjoyed every boom, splash, and glitter across the horizon. Alec got the best view on top of Pieter's shoulders and Bella and I tried to get a view through the street between the people. We decided about 20 minutes into the celebration to walk to the Metro to go home. The kids were absolutely tired. The coolest thing? While we walking, since the fireworks were just about getting done, but not yet completely finished, everyone, the cars, the people, the streets were FROZEN watching it all. While we walked back it was surreal, the Ruiters walking through Paris frozen in time on Bastille Day. A perfect way to end our 1st day...

Arguing for the rights of 7 Baha'is

In 1994 I had the pleasure and honor of working at the Baha'i International Community as an intern for the Main Representative of this NGO to the United Nations. I will never forget that summer, as it was my first true exposure to fighting for human rights on behalf of Baha'is who were being systematically persecuted by the Government of Iran. As an intern, I learned how advocating on behalf of the Baha'is on the world stage is essential and necessary to improve the conditions of their rights, and moreover, create a platform to voice the injustices and continued violations of human rights by the Iranian Government. Unfortunately as yet, the violations have continued and now, recent events have placed this issue once again on the world stage.

7 Bahai's were arrested and imprisoned in Spring of 2008 due to incredulous unfounded allegations, including spying for Israel and propaganda against Islam etc. The trial is ongoing and the allegations are being bravely fought by the first Iranian awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, Shirin Abadi.

Being raised Muslim, I can tell you personally that it infuriates me that these allegations and actions could be made against these Baha'is, ranging in age from 35 to 75, with occupations including an educator, engineer, school principal, factory owner, social worker and optometrist. Anyone that knows any facts about the Baha'i Faith knows that it is a religion that has no tolerance for disunity, political scheming or any such crimes as described which they are clearly fabricating. Rather, it represents ideals and vision that necessitates mutual respect, obedience to government and acknowledgement that all religions, including Islam are part of one greater plan of one God and as a result are invaluable and necessary for continuing evolving progress of the human race. Furthermore, the organization of Baha'is are created to promote these ideas, support global community development and encourage everyone to see everyone else as part of one human family. Despite this however, there is a legal authority in Iran that sees these Baha'is and their organization as a threat.

The Baha'i International Community, the same NGO that I worked for 15 years ago, issued a letter to the Prosecutor of the Iranian court that articulates in eloquent detail, the reasons that these allegations are false. It provides an outline of the history of the violations of human rights against the Bahai's over the years and argues persuasively that the judiciary must take into consideration these facts and judge fairly. I have attached the link and urge you to read this.

If you want to help bring attention to these issues, please write your Congressman to support a bill currently on the House and Senate floor (Senate. Res. 71, House. Res. 175) condemning the Government of Iran for its continued state-support persecution of the Baha'i religious minority.

As a Baha'i and lawyer, I thank you for listening.

“It is from numberless diverse acts of courage and belief that human history is shaped. Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope.” --Robert Kennedy

From winter to spring

As the snow melted over this weekend, and the weather went from chilly 17 degrees to a warm 60 practically overnight, I was reminded of a few fun things we did over the last few months, and how time flies right by from winter into spring.

1) Bella and Alec found a cocooned caterpillar and built a lovely stick-leaf-rock-grass house so when it emerges the Butterfly will be greeted with a welcome.

2) As a Baha'i, the celebration of Ayyam-i-Ha takes place prior to the 19 days of fasting (which is currently underway). For this year's holiday, apart from the fun presents that Pieter and I gave to Alec and Bella, I presented a lesson to Bella's 2nd grade classroom on what it means to be a Baha'i; and how we celebrate this time of year. It was fun and I was amazed at how many kids could really understand that the concept of unity of religion, and that there are always religious teachers over time. They each even read a few quotes from various writings of Buddha, Islam, Judaism, Christianity and Baha'i.

3) Thanks to a really nice work appreciation award, our family was invited to go to Puerto Rico for 4 days, and I saw the most beautiful sunset I have ever seen (see above). Since there were about 7 pools to choose from, we had our choices of slides, lazy rivers and swimming adventures. Isabella commented that after sliding down crazy long water slides, that it was the best day of her whole life. We also heard a bit more salsa music than we probably ever wanted, but it was a really nice experience (Alec's fevers and non-stop vomiting during 2 nights was the only bummer).

4) I went ice-skating on a home made ice rink that my husband rigged in our back patio. It was actually amazing fun. This was especially because Pieter, who can ice-skate circles around me (literally) held my hand and guided me as I slowly learned how to glide. Plus, Isabella is visibly a great potential figure skater in the making.

5) Determined to not give up my gardening skills all together--I am currently re-assessing my veggie garden skills and will attempt to plant leeks-broccolis-tomatoes, lettuce (the arugula kind) and onions despite my fears, hesitation and suspicion that the deer, bunnies and squirrel are waiting for me to plant their upcoming dinners.

6) I am currently in a book-study circle using the Ruhi Collaborative Book series. As part of the Baha'i outreach efforts, there is a great cycle of books where a few friends decide to engage on studying Baha'i writings together and learn how to apply spiritual principles to your daily life; whether as a student, mother, worker etc. One of the coolest things that happened over this past winter is that I was part of a group that completed Book 1 (Reflections of Life of the Spirit) with 2 of my good friends. We are now embarking on completing Book 4 (the Twin Manifestations) which describes in great story-telling ways how the Baha'i Faith began. There is nothing more intriguing or inspiring that seeing a friend unaware of certain ideas, discover practical answers to life's big questions. I am psyched and excited about this, and hope to reveal more later in the coming months.

In any event, I will post more soon, and will have some cool news to share about the SOUL PANCAKE!!!!

New Angels

Days go by so quickly, but once in a while, the clock stops, and you find out that out of the blue, someone you love and care for suddenly passes away from this world.

At those moments, I am struck by my memories and am in wonder whether I could have pushed the time a little further back to share another minute, a conversation or hug with people we love. Its ironic that the people we miss the most are those who gave so much of themselves in life.

Perhaps that is what it is all about...

"You would know the secret of death.
But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life?
The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light.
If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.
For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.

In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond;
And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring.
Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.
Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.
Is the shepherd not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?
Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?

For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?
And what is it to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?

Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.
And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.
And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance."

KHALIL GIBRAN

Marches in Mumbai

I was struck today listening to NPR's report of marches in Mumbai, how thousands of people flooded the streets marching in solidarity against the bombing attacks last week, some calling out for war, for peace, for justice by the government, mourning over relatives, and anger against Pakistan, and anger at the security forces that did not do enough to prevent this tragedy from happening.

As i heard the news, a strange sense of culture rooted me into the story. As if I was pulled into this chapter of current events and felt deep concerns about the issues that the news report focused on. I felt deeply connected to my background.

My family is from Pakistan.

While the reporter continued his story, I could see the faces, sense the feelings of outrage and hurt, and could fathom the loss of life in an instant of a loved one unfairly. Their voices were angry, passionate, determined and demanding justice. Somehow the sound of their cries were heard, and I felt sorry, sad and unsure what I should do.

My Father risked his life as a 13 year old boy as he traveled by train with millions of others when he left India during the partition. He was hiding in a basket, witnessed many atrocities that I never asked him about, and then he life in Pakistan began.

Amazing, how many thousands of miles away we are, back to the present, that when I first heard foggy details about the killings in Mumbai, I was at my sister's in Upstate NY, enjoying thanksgiving, and learning a to play Apples to Apples and laughing together about how many arguments we could create around words.

Whenever people ask me where I am from, I say I am an American with Pakistani Parents, not a Pakistani born in America

And yet, now I feel connected to them, that part of the world. Is this because the sound of the injustice from the voices rang so true to me, or because I was connected to their pain, connected to their hurt and want so much to help fix it. Everyone should fix it. I even thought up a campaign for all Pakistanis around the world to wear the Indian national colors in solidarity with their loss (White Saffron and Green anyone?).

Armed

There have been SO MUCH that has happened over the last few months, a new President, new potential for the United States and for people to see each other through the eyes of hope and unity, rather than through apathy, fear and prejudice. How wonderful it is to be inspired again!!

At the same time, I cannot forget that there are so many people, some whom i know personally who are suffering from a loss, are ill beyond repair, missing a friend and who cannot see the bright side of tomorrow. For everyone, and for me, when times get difficult, we have to remember that no matter what, there is always hope, and always a way back.

"Armed with the power of Thy name nothing can ever hurt me, and with Thy love in my heart all the world’s afflictions can in no wise alarm me ..."

Watch this video by Devon Gundry, "Armed". May it touch your heart.

http://vimeo.com/2228238

My lesson

This summer has swept by so fast...The biggest event was our 2 week visit to Holland. It was a vacation that I will never forget, partly because of introducing Europe to our kids, but also because of the friends and family we connected with.

During the 1st week, we attended a Baha'i Summer School at the Depoort Conference Center; which was filled with seeing old friends, many of whom we hadn't seen for a decade. Over coffees, dinners, and by the campsite, we connected and reignited the amazing friendships we remembered. We also found new shared experiences in our common futures, with family, lifestyles and balance. The close experience of true friendship blew me away.

It was unique, remarkable and so unexpected.

The 2nd week was a continuation and combined visits to older places, where Pieter grew up and visiting places he had been to as a child, having lots of fun and spending some time with family.

Once we got home, we found that a couple of ideas were born from this trip. Some of them acknowledging that perhaps we would find a stronger sense of home in Europe; and others inspiring a re-think on priorities and ensuring that we let the most important aspects of life take center stage.

Either way, it brought us to the realization that there is much fruit to bear and many more things to learn. The direction is unclear, but the journey has begun...

I wanted to end this blog entry with a poem, and message to my friends who I had the great honor of seeing, with whom I shared moments that I will not soon forget. To all of them, I miss you, until the next time. : )

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Friendship

And a youth said, 'Speak to us of Friendship.'

Your friend is your needs answered.

He is your field which you sow with love and reap with thanksgiving.

And he is your board and your fireside.

For you come to him with your hunger, and you seek him for peace.

When your friend speaks his mind you fear not the 'nay' in your own mind, nor do you withhold the 'ay.'

And when he is silent your heart ceases not to listen to his heart;

For without words, in friendship, all thoughts, all desires, all expectations are born and shared, with joy that is unacclaimed.

When you part from your friend, you grieve not;

For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.

And let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.

For love that seeks aught but the disclosure of its own mystery is not love but a net cast forth: and only the unprofitable is caught.

And let your best be for your friend.

If he must know the ebb of your tide, let him know its flood also.

For what is your friend that you should seek him with hours to kill?

Seek him always with hours to live.

For it is his to fill your need, but not your emptiness.

And in the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures.

For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.

-Kahlil Gibran
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Washington, and the path ahead

I have been WAY to busy to write down even a little of what has happened this summer. But I have to just stop and write before this summer passes me by. We have done so many things already (including Blueberry picking, visiting NY, bowling etc.) but I will start at the beginning and will write more later about the rest (soon).

First, I should mention Washington, the place I go almost every week for work. Lots of folks (especially from work) could not believe this was the venue that Pieter and I would decide to visit for a 2 day get-away. However, much to my surprise, we discovered some of America's amazing treasures. (That sounds so cliche doesn't it?) I was suprised to realize that this country was formed by individuals who retained absolutely groundbreaking ideals and were led by principles of justice, freedom and equity trying to form this nation into its own story, broken from the past of the British Empire.

The prologue was on display at our first stop: The Library of Congress. (for more info on this place, go to the link above)

From seeing the actual books from Thomas Jefferson's library (which I should mention was really a treat as the collection mapped closely to Pieter's own collection) , to the redlined drafts of the Declaration of Independence, I was blown away from what I heard and saw. Although I expected that the multi-media presentation (from gliding screens of text, to movie and visual presentations; and tours etc.) would be helpful, I had no idea how objectively presented the history was displayed.

Right next to the drafts of the Declaration of Independence, and letters displayed in cases (among our founders) that a 2 party system was simply a horrible idea due to the division etc., there were short movie clips depicting various aspects of our history. Yet instead of patriotic symbolic movies, it actually contained realistic portrayals of times in our country when the principles of our nation were in conflict with its actions. Women's rights, treatment of blacks, the civil rights movement, treatment of the Japanese during World War 2, McCarthyism, times when our nation was frankly not proud and tall but had much to learn. It was refreshing to see such unbiased chapters of our story open and on display for the world to see.

The awe of the building, the architecture, the stories given by the tour guides were memorable and uncanny. In order to carve the staircase into little angels (16 or so) illustrating various types labor in the US at the time, the carver actually carved the marble right there out of a huge slab right in the Library of Congress, I forgot how many years it took, but it was stunning, and the carvings were amazing.

All of this was captured in this National Library of Congress, a place that our Government can access and read about any area of knowledge they wish (13 stories of books by the way!!)

We also saw the Holocaust Memorial and the Native American Museum, both affecting us very deeply and touched our hearts based on the history which we knew, but often don't remember on a daily basis. I was very glad to see both places, and frankly it made me pensive about much of where the world is heading, due to the similarity of the extremism that we witnessed as a world only half a century ago, could repeat itself again and again unless we engage in a different more enlightened path. The images I saw, and the facts that I learned are hard to recount on a blog, and does not really give the history its attention that it deserves. I will say however, that it seems we are running out of rope to repeat history too many more times.

It reminds me of what I felt at the Library of Congress, seeing how fresh idealism and perseverance helped form this country, and how tenacity set new ground for a nation built on principles unlike many around the world. It was not easy, and certainly could not have been certain. I wonder if they were here today, and were trying to figure out the issues around the world, where they would go; how they would think. Perhaps the good of the world, rather than nation? Imagine that.

"Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom."
Thomas Jefferson

"My first wish is to see this plague of mankind, war, banished from the earth."
George Washington

"We hold these truths to be sacred and undeniable, that all men are created equal and independent, that from that equal creation they derive rights inherent and inalienable, among which are the preservation of life, and liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."
Thomas Jefferson